the-winchester-initiative:

posthumous-mcdouble:

Hypothesis: if women are worse at parking, it’s only because they’ve been lied to about what eight inches is their entire lives

image

(via pizza)


potatoandotherwise:

in math today my teacher asked what makes a number perfect and I said its dazzling personality and she almost kicked me out

(via lastminutewaffles)


evgeniemalkin:

why try and fuck one hockey player when you can be a ref and fuck an entire team

(via nealmalkin)


primacdonaldsgirl:

pretending to study in front of ur parents like 

image

(via wazhowski)



jaclcfrost:

assrah:

jaclcfrost:

my songs have vague suspicions about what you did in the dark

let’s precariously light these objects up

i am moderately aflame

(via satan-no-das-gay)


zenamiarts:

"But somewhere else, OK? A duplex, or an apartment… I don’t think a condo."
And he said “No, not a condo.”

This is a kinetic typography short I created because I absolutely adore Dylan Marron’s voice work for Carlos the Scientist, and I wanted to do something special for it. :]

While the visual is all me, the audio is from the Live at The Bell House recording of Condos, which you should totally buy in full here if you haven’t heard it yet: [x]

(via bluer-on-the-inside)


bitelchus:

swatlock:

Pop Culture References in Shrek 2 (1/?)

Click the gifs for more information

OH MY GOD, IM SO GLAD I FOUND THIS ON MY DASH.

I´VE BEEN LOOKING FOR IT FOR AGES. 

(via satan-no-das-gay)


jk rowling’s reasoning as to why fenrir greyback turned remus into a werewolf: remus’s father insulted him so he did it as an act of revenge

the actual reason greyback bit remus: the temptation to succumb to the fact that biting remus whose name literally means ‘werewolf’ would be the greatest feat in lycanthropic irony the world had ever seen

bagellie:

benefits of being friends with me

  • shitty jokes whenever you ask for them
  • shitty jokes whenever you don’t ask for them

(via pizza)